The Last Voyages: IC Inbox

[worthallthis]

There is no voice message here. Better hope you got the right box.

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[punched_hitler]

"No," not really, "I just - I know it wasn't easy." For so many reasons: for worrying Steve wanted him to be someone else, for not knowing what might pop up any given time they talked, for the way Steve still felt like he didn't know how to get it right or help him remember without it being painful, even without it being the first few times around.

"I'm glad I was here for it," he finds himself saying, because he is. It's so, so selfish, and he probably looks torn over it, even though he doesn't sound it.

[worthallthis]

"I'm glad you were, too. Because I bet it woulda been harder without you. Don't know how that other guy did it, just getting all his ideas about our past from books and what memories hit him," B says, shaking his head a little, then setting it back down on Steve's shoulder. "It was hard, even here. But I never really wanted you to go away, even when it was bad."

[punched_hitler]

"I don't know, either," Steve admits, quietly, and there's plenty of reverence, of respect, there. He wishes it hadn't been that way, but it had, and he doesn't know how Bucky did it - but he did, and that means a lot, too.

He relaxes just a little into B, even if he has to admit, "I really thought you should have. Wanted me to leave you alone." But B hadn't, and Steve hadn't been able to stay away without explicit instructions, so he guesses it worked out, if that's really how B had wanted it. "But it was nice. That you did want me around." Nice being a vast, gaping understatement. "That you gave me a chance to make up for it, even a little."

He lets out a breath, not wanting to argue about fault, because he knows they don't - and probably won't ever - see eye to eye on that. "I guess that's what we do, then. We stick around." For the people who need it.

[worthallthis]

B doesn't want to argue about it, either, so he's just not going to bother. "Think it worked out, in the end," he says instead, giving Steve's shoulder a little pat before wrapping that arm back around him. "You an' me. Sticking around." B's pretty happy with it, even if there are still so many losses to weather. At least he doesn't have to weather them completely alone, like out in the world.

If he can help other people feel less alone, too, that's even better.

[punched_hitler]

"That's what I'm good at," he says, with a hint of a sigh, though as soon as he says it, he winces a little, knowing that B's Steve... wasn't, apparently.

Well. He is. So there.

"We'll stick around," he confirms, even though he knows at least part of it isn't up to them. But some part of it is. "And maybe Lark will be back. Even if I'm still not sure I want him back."

He doesn't get mad at people for coming back, these days. But he still doesn't know that this really is the best life for anyone long-term. Except maybe Iris.