"I - " He pauses, has to parse that just a little, but, "I would never ask you to. B, I - "
He had. He had asked so many wardens to leave him dead, if it came to it. He remembers when they hadn't respected his wishes. He remembers just feeling... well. Of course they hadn't. He'd stopped asking, after a while.
But he'd eventually told Yara she could bring him back, if she needed to. He'd promised himself to her, and he's broken that promise a hundred times over, he knows, but he'd wanted to keep it.
He's made a promise to B, too. And he wants to keep that.
"I know you'll bring me back," he finally says, softly. "It's what I want. It's how I get to stay with you." He isn't sure he can bring himself to say in so many words that he hadn't wanted it for a long time. (He's pretty sure B already knows, without Steve explicitly explaining why. That won't help.)
no subject
He had. He had asked so many wardens to leave him dead, if it came to it. He remembers when they hadn't respected his wishes. He remembers just feeling... well. Of course they hadn't. He'd stopped asking, after a while.
But he'd eventually told Yara she could bring him back, if she needed to. He'd promised himself to her, and he's broken that promise a hundred times over, he knows, but he'd wanted to keep it.
He's made a promise to B, too. And he wants to keep that.
"I know you'll bring me back," he finally says, softly. "It's what I want. It's how I get to stay with you." He isn't sure he can bring himself to say in so many words that he hadn't wanted it for a long time. (He's pretty sure B already knows, without Steve explicitly explaining why. That won't help.)